So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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