I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
