Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
