No awkward lesbian experiences without me
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
