Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
