Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
