Slut skills are useful in every country.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize