Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
