What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
