Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
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He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
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I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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