why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I said "one day" and that day is not today
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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