The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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