is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize