I need help removing her.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
