just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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