ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
