Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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