Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize