Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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