I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize