he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
