Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.

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(705): View more from Ontario

dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest

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(206): View more from Washington

i want to swaddle you in tequila

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.

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(269): View more from Michigan

If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you

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(817): View more from Texas

Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.

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(850): View more from Florida

Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.

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