On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
