I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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