I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
