sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
