and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
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this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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