White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
only if we run a train.
done.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Randomize
