Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
