That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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