Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
