Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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