But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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