So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
