Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
