Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
