I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
