So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
