it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
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