I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize