I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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