I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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