I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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