Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
