i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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