I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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