Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
