Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
