How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
This is classic penis vs brain.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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