well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
