i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
